36th wedding anniversary.

I dreamed about a quilt last night and it finally woke me up and I had to get a pencil and paper at 3:30 am and sketch it so I could go back to sleep.That usually occurs when I spend most of the evening online, reading quilt blogs but I didn't do that last night.

Rat Pack rally at Iron Horse in 2013. This kind of stuff goes on all season. 

Earl and I spent a delightful evening at Iron Horse. It was the annual, for the employees, Cinco de Mayo dinner which coincides with our anniversary. Some of our regular guests were there and people I have gotten to know over the past four year working there. I feel like it is a wonderful second family we have been given.

It also coincided with someone's birthday so there was singing and candles and applause and much laughter. At our end of the table Earl and I had flowers and cards and one dear lady bought me a box of crackers she knows I enjoy. I suppose that sounds silly but she know what I like and she knows I only buy them as special treat.

Toward the end of the evening, a dear friend Bonnie came to sit with me to congratulate us for surviving 36 years together.Whenever I see Bonnie around she is listening to someone. No matter the story, she stands there so connected and caring you cant help but tell her all about yourself. She is such a deeply devoted christian the light just seems to glow around her.She and her husband make such a cute pair, wherever she goes in the room his eyes follow her with such love. Just looking at them makes you feel all warm and fuzzy about the idea of everlasting love and commitment.

I wound up telling Bonnie how Earl and I got together and about our incredible journey through life. We have been so blessed. That realization is with me everyday and it is so uplifting that when I have problems it gives me faith that everything will work out. It wasn't always that way. It took me a while to stop worrying. I considered myself a optimistic pessimist. I figured if I obsessed about the things I feared the most, they might not happen and then I would be pleasantly surprised. My husband was not a worrier, he was too busy working for the power company and he worked a lot of overtime. As a result, most of the daily child rearing fell to me.

 Earl and I didn't have any children after we married but we adopted one and had custody of two more. That's when things got complicated and more fun. A little girl moved next door and her mom worked all the time. She was lonely and started coming over and she finally declared her place in the family as the big sister. The kids got old enough to go to school and the boys brought home two friends that needed a place to stay because their family was having problems. Those boys also became a part of our family.

Because I thought these kids needed a stay at home mom Earl and I decided that was the best thing to do. Then our friends started asking if their children, could stay with us for day care. Those children came to call us Aunt and Uncle and our family expanded more.

It wasn't long before our house was too small so we built a bigger one. My sister was having problems so she came to live with us with her girls. Those four little girls became so close, that now as adults they still thank me for the years they spent with us.

There are so many children I think of as my own. I'm not trying to take anything away from their parents. We are friends with those people and think of them as my sisters and brothers. We were co-parents. That old saying, "You can't pick your family," is so wrong. It truly does, "take a village to raise a child."

Foe example, the island we lived on was very supportive of our endeavor. The school refused to let me pay for lunches. People would give me the clothes their children outgrew. When I went to the goodwill store to shop with the kids, no matter what we had or how many bags we filled the total bill was always $5.00. The Methodist church gave me furniture. the Catholic church gave me food. I never asked for anything but people responded to what they perceived as a need.

For the most part, our life was been wonderfully happy. I had a bit of trouble when things first got complicated. I laid my troubles on the pastor of my church. He knew how much time I spent in the car driving kids around so he taped two notes to the dash board of my van. The first said: Live in the moment, don't obsess about the future or beat yourself up about the past. FEAR= False Evidence Appearing Real. The second said: Surrender to the flow of life and allow it to provide for you, easily and comfortably. Don't forget to breathe.

Even today when I feel stress creeping up on me my mantra is "Surrender to the flow, surrender to the flow. Breathe"

I"m sorry this post is particularly wordy with few pictures. I just had to share with you my experiences. If you are worried or afraid, try to surrender to the flow. God wants to help but you have to allow him to do his work. When we are stressed, our breathing becomes shallow so take a deep breath and blow it out slow. it relaxes you a bit. Worry never accomplishes anything. Things turn out the way they are going to anyway.

It has been a wonderful journey with the man of my dreams, and I thank God every day 

for helping me find him

Have a blessed day!